I'm ending the year with several lofty expectations.

Last night, at my work Christmas party, the woman I was conversing with suddenly blurted out, "do you know that you are going to be on a red carpet one day?" I laughed and she said, "Seriously, do you know that you are going to walk down a red carpet one day and photographers that you used to call to shoot the celeb du jour will be lined up to shoot you and we will all be watching on television saying, 'I wish I were her,' and 'I knew she would do it.'"

What to say to that? I don't have any particular talent at all. In fact, I think I am a certified mess. I think they are 85,000,000 I could do and rock at, but because there are so many, I lack the one essential thing: the focus to be the best at one of them.

But I did tell her that when I walk down the red carpet, I will put that perky Cameron Diaz to shame and shine in the most fashionable outfit the world has ever seen covering the most rockin' bod in the land and the biggest fucking smile this side of the Miss America pagent. If I do it, I'm doing it right. I'd really better get cracking. That's a lot to live up to and as my Mom pointed out, my ass is out of control.

Tonight. Tonight me and my girls did Pollyanna's and we drank several large bottles of Veuve. My roommate, who's been a friend since college, told our other college friends that she wanted to make a toast and a prediction. Out of the blue, she winked at me and she said, "This is to Partygirl: the one of us who is going to make it and make it huge. I have complete faith that one day, and I know it will take time, she will write the book of the century. A bestseller to top bestsellers. And when she does, with you all as my witness, if she does not provide for me as she has promised, if she leaves me off the list at her celebrity book launch parties, I will sell every dirty secret of hers for every dime they are worth."

My other friend chimed in, "That is, unless she tells them all in the book first!"

And we laughed. And my roommate looked at me and said again, "She's going to make it."

That's a lot of pressure.

But in truth I will say, I am going to make it. I've known it since I was a child. I would watch stars on TV and I always knew that I was like them. I don't know how, but I am, and I know that I will make it.

And when I make it, it's not going to be some fleeting thing. I will be the best.

If it's the last thing I do, I will be famous.

You'll see.

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