22:05:45 | 2000-11-29


�Sunshine came softly...through my�window today��

And so it did, I thought as I rode the bus down Second Avenue this morning and listened to my MP3 player. Skipped Gomez, skipped Travis, listened to Janis and then�I was pleasantly surprised to hear �Sunshine Superman.� Not sure why I was surprised to hear Donovan, especially because I downloaded the current song list myself. But I was pleasantly surprised and nearly warmed, by this music choice that seemed so fitting for the day ahead.

�Could've tripped out easy �but I've a-changed my ways��

Yes, I am onto something that�s going to change this melancholy. I�m not one to hold grudges and I�m not one to take anything lying down, especially a bad mood. I am in control of my life. I think that every day that I wake up and think of what�s ahead.

�It'll take time, I know it�but in a while You're gonna be mine�I'll pick up your hand and slowly blow your little mind�'Cause I made my mind up you're going to be mine��

Donovan was pretty confident about his life. And look at how it turned out, I thought to myself. Not to pick on Donovan, but who KNOWS what going to happen, you know? Why spend time freaking about it, that�s what I was thinking this morning when I realized that I may have, yet again, gotten the �icks.�

The �icks� kind of sneak up on all of us, when we least expect it. Things are going well with the significant other, he or she has common interests or common friends or great taste in music or films or whatever. And the next thing you know, you are just itching to get some alone time and you don�t know why.

I mean, you feel bad about the �icks,� because you know you should like this person and you KNOW the person really likes you but well, he/she leans over to kiss and all you can think is �ICK!�

And when you get to the point when you hear his or her voice on the phone and get that terrible feeling of dread in your tummy, well, that�s level 3 icks. Get out fast!

I had a friend who had the icks so bad this past year, and level 3 just hit her when we were all in this bar with this guy she had just started dating. Well, to save her from the icks we had to stage this plan where she allegedly went to the bathroom with our one friend and D. and I stayed and talked to the guy while she escaped. All the guy talked about was how our friend was Ms. Right and how he wanted to marry her and was in love�okay�they had gone out twice before.

Normal? I think not.

So D. and I stayed and listened to him moan about our friend, or more aptly, we downed some drinks and made eye contact with other men we thought were hot in the bar for about 20 minutes. When the guy started asking about his girl, we pretended we didn't know where she was but we promised to look in the bathroom. At this opportunity, we bailed out of the bar and headed to the pre-planned meeting point. Leaving Mr. Ick, on his own. This maneuver, is also known as the Houdini.

I use the Houdini a lot, mainly because 1) I overdue it and often need to leave IMMEDIATELY when the liquor/drugs suddenly paralyzes my system; 2) because I hate the long, drawn out good-bye�s that are followed by the �No! Just one more drink, pleassssssseeee?!?� It�s never one more drink.

�Any trick in the book now, baby�all that I can find�Superman or Green Lantern ain't got�a-nothin' on me�I can make like a turtle and dive for� your pearls in the sea, yeah!�

Which brings me to the point here. I don�t think I like Mr. Destiny anymore. He�s just not entertaining. And I guess I don�t know him well enough and maybe he would be a good balance for me, but again, I don�t really think he likes me. And I�m pretty sure I�m not interested in him.

I mean he�s Hot. He�s very hot. But I�m not really looking for a hot guy. And he�s nice. Really nice. And that was a bonus, because I�ve never dated a nice guy. I�ve dated freaks, drug addicts and frat boys.

It�s a totally different experience by the way, to hang out with someone nice. If you haven�t done it, you should try it!

So I�ve decided to keep on lookin�. That was always the plan anyway. The girls in my office said I am too picky. I say, fuck that.

My other friend told me, � you are one of the special people. And you need a special person too. Those guys are hard to find. But I�m working on it.�

So I�m just going to put it out there. Why not�she did it;-)

I�m looking for someone mentally stable in the metro-New York area. I don�t want any recoverers�AA, NA, GA, whatever. They claim pot is a gateway drug � but Nancy Reagan obviously never met me. Preferably you will be someone who does not listen to 80�s pop. But I can work around that. I�m looking for someone entertaining, and my concept of entertaining is totally warped. So, if you know any stupid party tricks or pranks or like to karaoke, I find those things entertaining. Magic Tricks are a BIG plus. Musicians welcome, I�m happy to be your Yoko Ono. Artistic inclinations are encouraged. Finger painting counts. Patience required. Lots and lots of patience required. Patience is a key element here. Intellect, also key. Wit, essential. Sense of humor, important. More important, is finding ME humorous. Because I�m constantly laughing at myself. You have to like to go out. But you are also seeking companionship. Not thinking marriage or anything grown up like that. Love of the Dukes of Hazzard. Love of Beer. Love of Drugs. Love of me. A beach person, not a LAKE person. Definitely beach. Willingness to travel. And patience, did I mention patience?

�You-you-you can just sit there a-thinking� on your velvet throne�'bout all the rainbows a�you can a�have for your own�When you've made your mind up forever�to be mine� I'll pick up your hand and slowly�blow your little mind.�

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