Sometimes, it's eerie how much an artist's song lyrics can reflect a person's life. I guess the same goes for TV and Movie characters. I think that's why some people go so crazy over celebrities or rockstars and the like. Something strikes a chord, and people think that a song is written about them or a movie is based on their life. And they confuse that artist as relating, as understanding, to them.
I've had that experience before.
But I felt it vicariously for friends today, when I heard this song, that seemed to speak for them:
"....She got home late
She drank so hard the bottle ached
& she tried and she tried and she tried and she tried...
but nothin's clear in a bar full a flies
she takes and she takes, she takes and she takes,
she understands when she gives it away"
"She says:
Man, I gotta get out of this town
Man, I gotta get out this town
Man, I gotta get out of this town...."
"...she met man, he took her in
fed her all the same bullshit, again,
as he lied and he lied and he lied,
lied like a salesmen selling flies"
"So she screamed & she screamed & she screamed & she screamed...it's a different place...but the same old thang...It's all I love, It's all I hate, It's all too much for me to take...I can't be sure where it begins or if the good life lies within...."
"So she said:
Man I gotta get out of this town
Yeah now I gotta get back on that train
Man I gotta get out of this town
I'm outta my pain..."
I guess we would all be wise to listen to Beth Hart. That song I'm referencing is "Back to LA," in case you are wondering.
*~*
Is there such a thing as "unforgivable?" I ask because I'm totally melodramatic and if you catch me on a bad day, I could declare that the fiend who drank my last Diet Coke,will never be forgiven. Enemy for life.
But that's me.
What's unforgivable to you? I'm interested to hear (write it in my guestbook).
Or, should I ask, what's forgivable? How much can you forgive?
Or, can you imagine being so hurt, so tired from being hurt, that you don't want to forgive, but find it easier to close a chapter on your life?
I've done it. Allowed someone to piss me off to such a degree, that I cut that person (several people, actually) off from my life. For years. Does that make me a bad person? Probably.
Come to think of it, that's probably my fatal flaw, or greatest skill - depending which way you look at it. Cutting people off with no remorse.
I recently ran into someone who I cut off in 1994. My former best friend. She crossed me once, and I forgave her. But the second time, when she crossed me, I decided I was too tired of her selfishness to reconcile. I listened to her tell her side of a story, and she didn't have a twitch of remorse or interest in what I had been through or what she had put me through over the years and it hit me like a ton of bricks. When she stopped talking, I asked her if she was finished? When she haughtily said, yes, I hung up on her.
She called after that, but I never took the calls.
I ran into her at parties and stayed on the opposite side of the room. If she cornered me, I answered her questions with one word answers.
She sent me letters, apologizing, explaining she had made a mistake and that she was sorry.
On my birthday each year for several years, regardless of where I had moved to, she tracked me down and sent me a card. Sometimes, I would see the return address and throw them away without opening them.
Shortly after I cut her off, my other friends did as well.
But I heard about her through friends. Someone would bump into her and say she didn't look well: she had lost weight, she was pale, she looked unhappy. I put this information out of my mind as easily as I had shut her out of my life.
And then this weekend, I ran into her. Six years later.
And God, I felt so bad for her. She seemed so lonely. She kept hugging me and telling me how good it was to see me. She gave me her number and her e-mail. Which, of course, I lost later night because I'm such a freakin' lush...
But back to my story. I really felt badly for her. Six years have passed and she doesn't have a friend in the world except for her BF. She seemed so lonely.
Did she do something unforgivable? Nope.
Sometimes friendships just end.
Never promise friends you'll stick around forever.
Sometimes you have to just walk away.
To save yourself.
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