My cousin Frogs e-mailed me today to tell me she's in a funk and needs to get out it. Do you know this feeling, she asked?

My friend Toastress recently mentioned the same thing.

I told them both that I know exactly how they feel. I patented funks and angst. My 20's were filled with funk and angst. I invented, trademarked and patented angst.

What you need to do to get over it, is force yourself into a situation that is so much fun, it's breaks the spell. It makes you yearn, once again for life.

Yearn, Frogs asked? Do you yearn, Partygirl? Do you yearn for life?

Yes, I do yearn for life. I always have and I guess that's why my highs are so high and my lows and get really, really low. I yearn for life. I want to eat up the world and everyone in it. I have a voracious appetite for living and lately, everything in this world has looked so good to me that I've wanted to taste all of it.

I've never taken life passively. I am passionate about just about everything, which, subjectively speaking, is what holds me back from intimate relationships. I see how my passion in other areas can burn me deeply and I just haven't ever felt like I could open myself up to that kind of personal pain.

Getting older has helped me to see that my passion is unique and shouldn't be allowed to hold me back from loving other things than life.

September 11th, for all that it was: a tragedy, a national disaster and now an ominous date in history, showed me that I can withstand enormous pain. It showed me that I can get hurt and experience the same hurt as occurs with intimacy, just as deeply and just a personally. It taught me that I just can't protect myself forever.

I guess these learnings somewhat explain my recent joie de vivre for life and living. It's a reason for my new fearlessness and an example of how great pain can't stop my yearning for living every day to the fullest of my means.

I'm a yearner.

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