Emotions seem to be at an all time high around the US thanks to the Machevellian White House. This country is turning into a modern day Leviathon.

Last night I walked a few blocks midtown in desparate search of a taxi and it was eerily identical to walking the streets on September 12, 2001. The streets were quiet, very few people outside for so early on a Friday night. I work near the UN, and heavy artillery vehicles of the NYPD lined our streets. For some reason the streets were also covered with a very fine white sand. It was blowing in my eyes and hitting the back of my throat as a I tried to breathe and it took me back for a moment, to that day when we thought we were under attack for a second time, as the accrid dust of incinerated bodies and buildings covered all of us. I tasted it and it wasn't the same, so I assume it may have been a weather precaution as we are anticipating heavy snow this w/e.

I found a taxi four blocks away and jumped in; we crawled up the avenue. Suddenly, an SUV driven by some Joey Bag-a-donuts guy pulled up and from the driver's side of his car, began the angriest and most fearful tirade against my Indian taxi driver that I have ever seen.

"You f*ing sand nigger!!!! F* you, you F*ing F*! F* You! Sand Nigger! Go Back to your own F*ing country!"

The taxi driver engaged him, growing increasingly votile with each hurtful word, "F* You! F* You! This is my country too! I am American! F* You you F*ing F*! F* You."

It continued for about 3 minutes and became increasingly violent, with the SUV goombah moving over to the driver's side, in traffic, toward the taxi with his fist in the air, swinging. I slumped down for a moment in the backseat, sure that he was reaching for a gun in his glove compartment. I put my hand on the door handle and looked to my right. If I jumped out, I would be in the middle of three lanes of slowly moving traffic, which could pick up speed at any time.

What to do...

I hedged my bets. I stayed, held my belongings close to me and prepared to leap from the car and into oncoming traffic.

And then we started to move away from the SUV.

We drove along in silence for a few blocks, me completely still like a child after watching her father beat her mother. Careful not to move and trigger the false calm.

The taxi driver spoke in a strained voice and apologized to me. "I am an American," he said, "but they see the color of my skin and accuse me of being the enemy."

"My children were born here, they are American also, but they receive the same treatment at school and in everyday life. Since September 11th, we are treated like outcasts, the enemy, but we are Americans and we were attacked also on September 11th."

"I hear you," I said. "And I think it's bullshit. But you can't feed into the anger, it's unproductive. You need to shut out the negativity and not respond to it."

"I wish you well," I said as I parted his taxi.

The last few days I have been caught in other people's negativity. I sense that this is because I have finally reached a truly positive place in my life and I am placed in these situations to share that serenity.

I'm open to that. It's time I returned the favor for those in my past who have acted as a calming influence toward me.

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