Yes, I am evil. I know.

*~*

Tonight, however, I was a domestic goddess. That's the label my uncle uses for me in jest, but I would like to state, I do have domestic capabilities.

For instance, tonight I went to the grocery store! Oh yes, I did! I typed up a list of what I need for the week, and I bought groceries.

Then I came home and whipped up dinner (!!!!) while I waited for my groceries to be delivered. Also while cooking, I cleaned out our cabinets, sorted old canned goods that should be donated to a food bank, organized shelves by spices/dried goods/canned goods, wiped down the shelves, washed the dishes and put them away.

After I ate, I washed the dishes I used, wiped down the counters, cleaned out the refrigerator and cleaned the Brita, refilling it and placing it back into the refrigerator.

Then, I came upstairs and temporarily fixed my roommates' luggage.

I contemplated calling my Mother, who gave me her card this weekend as a not-so-subtle hint telling me to call her once in a while, and then ditched that idea after remembering what happened this weekend.

That's another story.

You see, I went to this swanky engagement party this weekend...and my whole family was there...

Anyway, as I haven't been drinking, I had a couple of glasses of sangria...And I didn't eat anything because I was mingling...

And then some people suggested we go upstairs to a private room to smoke some cigarettes...

I agreed.

We were up there for a few minutes, just a small group of us.

Anyway, one thing led to another...and since the party was wrapping up, *someone* suggested getting a bat out...and then *someone* took a hit off of that and passed it to the almost-groom...as he took a hit, the door to the secret room was flung open, by his mother.

"What are you kids doing in here!?" Then looking at him as he whipped the contraband into his blazer pocket, she sputtered, "Your father's going to give his speech!"

He ran out of the room and then the others ran out and as I was slightly...ahem...confused...I ran out last, just before the best man.

What I didn't realize, until I ran out, was that I was trailing way behind, and the best man decided it was too late and hid in the room and the Groom's father was standing on the second floor landing of a palatial winding staircase...

I screeched to a halt, but it was too late. I was on his right and below me, like a scene out of Evita, were about 150 society guests standing gathered in the spacious foyer below, waiting with anticipation for their host's words.

"Partygirl!" he stopped and says mid-sentence, to the crowd. "What are you doing - I'm trying to give my speech!"

I silently counted to three, raised my head, walked behind him on the landing and slowly began my descent.

The room had grown so quiet with my unexpected entrance, and the staircase was so looooong, I had to do something...and fast.

Without turning my head, I said loud enough for everyone to hear, "Sorry, I was having a meeting."

"Having a meeting?" he repeated, puzzled.

"Yes, I was having a board meeting. We do that from time to time. I'm the chairman."

The crowd laughed. I reached the ground floor landing.

I was safe.

Or so I thought.

I got a teasing earful from the groom's father the following day, because he said I always have to be the center of attention and that I tried to ruin his speech.

Frankly, I was just trying to cover my ass, but hell, maybe he's right.

Did I mention I am a domestic goddess?

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