I've been thinking this month. Way too early for these thoughts. I don't know whether it's the 5th anniversary or the life changes I am gearing up for or all recent coverage - movies, conspiracy theories - but I've been thinking about the terror attacks in the US that happened five years ago.

I'm at the same job. Working with most of the same people. Living in the same apartment. It's almost seems like my world froze on that day five years ago and my way of dealing with it was stopping in my tracks. Keeping everything status quo.

I don't really think that. I've done a huge amount of living and growing up since then. And some things have remained the same.

This particular anniversary makes me think. I always said to myself, that one day, when the pain from grieving wasn't so enormous, that I would print out my entries her from Sept 11, 2001 and bind them with print outs of your comments for me and your emails and let my friend who lost her husband process this end of the search and t he outpouring of empathy and compassion that complete strangers showed. Somewhere along the line, I marked that time in my mind as the fifth anniversary of the attack.

Yet here we are. And five years seems like too long and not long enough. MY friend remarried but her marriage is just planting roots - is it fair to share this now? Will it throw her an unnecessary curve? Or has she so completely progressed that she may be ready and interested to read it, perhaps it will provide her closure?

I guess I'll keep thinking about it.

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